I need to vent. So feel free to skip this post if you should so desire. Go ahead, I'll wait....
Here's the thing. I'm on Facebook. And I've found that to be a bit of a good thing. I've been able to get in touch with old friends I haven't seen, or heard from, in years -- there's my friend who I just found after 15 years, and she's a reality-TV producer -- she's got nothing to do with Jon and Kate though. There's one of my best friend's from college -- I was in her wedding -- but we lost track because her husband was in medical school and doing all of the internships and residencies and they kept moving and we just lost touch in one of the moves. Or there's my oldest ever friend, who I've known since kindergarten.
The thing about Facebook is you get to give these status updates -- it's a way to say whatever you want. I usually throw up some smart-ass statement, and somebody insults you back, etc. But the other day, I posted that I had a new slogan for my business: "Will sue for rent." That's an old law school joke. But some sort of friend -- someone I knew in high school, sent me a note wanting to know where I lost my way and what happened to me because I was so smart and on target in high school.
It's like I had somehow done something to harm her because I wasn't what she wanted me to be, or something. And frankly, it kind of hurt my feelings, and pissed me off. Sure, maybe I'm a bit lost now. I lost the job I've had for nearly a decade. I'm having trouble finding another. I'm spending my 401k. I'm trying to start a new business. I would think that most people would be a bit lost after what I've been through this year. But it's hard enough trying to live up to my expectations -- which, believe it or not, are rather high. I didn't know I was also trying to live up to the expectations of some person I haven't seen in over 20 years.
And frankly, I would never send a message like to one of my friends. I would never ask somebody who I know is struggling how they lost their way. Who does that? I have friends who are having problems -- some worse than me -- and I don't send them notes about how you screwed up your life, you know that, don't you? No, I ask if there's any way that I can help. Because, in my opinion, that's what friends are supposed to do. Then again, I am a bit of a loser, so I guess I'm different than everybody else.
Okay, the venting is over. Sorry about that.